I had a slight glimpse of freedom the last couple of days. Well, maybe not complete freedom, but a slight loosening of the chains. However, I am sorry to report it didn't last long. I was completely lambasted tonight. satan knows when I see some light at the end of the tunnel and he brings out the big guns.
My day went pretty well, but ended up with a full on attack about how unlovable I am, how I give everything I am and have to this huge family I have, with absolutely no care to how I am, or how I'm feeling. I have had some huge life changes in the past few years and I don't even recognize who I am. I don't have any time to do any of the things I love to do and the things that make me, me.
After I cooked a huge spread for the family and couldn't eat because I'm not feeling well, the baby started to cry and I left the hub and the kids upstairs eating dinner. As I was rocking the baby, I looked up verses on who I am in Christ.
I will not be condemned by God.
There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1
I have been set free in Christ.
For freedom Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not be subject again to the yoke of slavery.
The peace of God guards my heart and mind.
And the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Phil 4:19
I ended up falling asleep in the rocking chair with this sweet little boy in my arms and woke up a while later and went upstairs. You know what I was greeted with? A family who embraced me, laid hands on me and prayed for me, that I would feel better and get the rest that I needed tonight.
I got a glimpse of some truth tonight. That no matter what satan whispers in my ear and twists in my brain, I am loved, appreciated, and I matter.
Thank you Jesus.